WHAT JUST HAPPEN? WHAT?

I AM SO MISERABLE RIGHT NOW. MY EARS ARE SERIOUSLY PLUGGED UP. NOT AS BAD AS MONDAY. NOT HEARING IS NOT COOL. MY FLAT SCREEN IS  KINDA LOUD. DON'T DO WELL WHEN I AM SICK. BEEN OUT ALL WEEK. I GET TO BE QUEEN BABY. WHAT SUCKS IS THAT I AM UNATTACHED. SO, WHO'S WATCHING THE PERFORMANCE.  I AM A LITTLE   NEEDY WHEN I AM SICK.OK, I'M A LOT NEEDY. YA FEEL ME. I AM FEELING INSECURE ABOUT WHETHER I CAN DO THE JOB. OOPS, NEW RANDOM...YEAH, I AM LETTING THE DEVIL RENT SPACE. PARALEGAL, FOR ME IS NEW TERRITORY FOR ME. I AM LEARNING WITHOUT A POINT OF REFERENCE AS I HAVE WITH ADDICTION COUNSELOR. NO MATTER THE DYSFUNCTION I GOT A FAMILY MEMBER THAT CAN MEET CRITERIA. THIS IS ALL ABOUT ME FOR ONCE. LIFE OF A CARETAKER IS ABOUT TO TAKE A BACK SEAT SO I CAN GET THIS. IT IS HARD TO QUALIFY MY ASSETS. I AM GOOD AT WHATEVER WITH PROPER TRAINING. I TRULY BELIEVE THAT. THE DEVIL IS NOT PLEASED WITH MY FAITH. I AM WALKING IN PSALM 121 WHICH MEANS I HAVE NO ROOM FOR THE DEVIL...IT'S ON.

DIVAS TO THE DANCE FLOOR, PLEASE

Praise the lord I feel like dancing. I am so tense the last few days. I am fighting with myself. I need to let some steam out. I usually don't feel lonely because of my having cats. They keep me entertained. I feel like I want to blow my speakers up....X....X....X...EX...STRA....VA.....GANZA....OH YEAH...I AM GOING TO DO SOME TRACKS NOW THAT I KNOW.....OKAY, I AM READY TO WALK THE RUNWAY. STOP AND GIVE THEM  SHADE.....POSE...REPRESENT.....DOWN AND TWIRLL...HOUSE OF NINJA...HOUSE OF PARIS.....WALK....STOP AND DISH.....GIVE THEM FACE.....

Junior Vasquez - X (Sound Factory Mix) 1994

I HATE FLORIDA

It is mid -February and I am in short and tee. It is 80 degrees. Who does that? I went to get a pizza. All of a sudden some one orders Pineapples on a slice of pizza. It's bad enough Florida can't make a decent pizza...but pineapples. I think not!

I have been avoiding go to VA. My gait is off, losing control of my legs when I stand up. I am always bumping into things and I can't recover from it. It may actually be my ears. I think my ears are swollen or too much wax. I am so not having any luck today.

I'M JUST SAYING ...

OK, SO I AM NOT DOWN WITH BLOGGING.'S NOT PERSONAL. ONE OF THE REASONS THAT I LEFT FACEBOOK AND NOW ON TWITTER IS  BECAUSE I REALLY DON'T WANT TO START JUDGING. I'M JUST SAYING. I DON'T WANT TO KNOW ANYTHING  OF PEOPLE THAT I HAVE NO RELATIONSHIP WITH. DON'T GET ME WRONG , THIS IS JUST MY SOCIAL ANXIETY AND OCD KICKING THE HECK OUT OF ME. I  DON'T WANT TO KNOW. I HAVE 20 YEARS IN COUNSELOR AND FACILITATED MANY GROUPS . SCHOOL IS MY ANSWER TO LET GO LET GOD. I'M JUST SAYING.



FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, YES MY LIFE,  I  NEVER MISSED WINTER OLYMPICS. WELL, THIS TIME IS A BIT DIFFERENT.  I DIDN'T SEE ANY OF THE OLYMPICS. AS A CARD CARRYING SPORTS FAN, YOU HAVE TO REPRESENT. I AM NOT SURE HOW THAT HAPPENED. YOU SIT UP AND SUCK IT UP. WATCH THE DAMN OLYMPICS !!! A LOST WEEKEND. JUST SAYING...

MAJOR PROPS TO VENUS WILLIAMS. SHE LOOKED FABULOUS. VINTAGE VENUS. WE ALMOST SAW A WILLIAMS/WILLIAMS FINAL. I BELIEVE VENUS WOULD HAVE BEAT BABY SIS. SOON...I HAVE PREACHED THAT DON'T VENUS IS NOT DONE YET. THANKS FOR A GREAT PLAY ALL WEEK. JUST SAYING...

CONSPIRSEY

JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOU HAVE ALL BASES COVERED, LIFE HAS A GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR. I SPENT ALL MORNING TRYING TO GET STREAM HUNTER SO I COULD WATCH THE VENUS WILLIAMS' SECOND ROUND MATCH. ADS, ADS AND MORE ADS. I AM SO DONE. NOT ONLY IS MY LAPTOP SLOW AS HELL DUE TO ALL THE JUNK I HAVE ON IT BUT I TRIED EVERYTHING. I AM WATCHING TENNIS MATCH FROM LIVE SCORES. THAT WAS NOT THE PLAN. AND TO TOP IT OFF SHE LOST. IT WAS HURTFUL. NOW NEITHER WILLIAMS SISTERS ARE IN. MAN, THIS IS FRUSTRATING.VENUS IS GETTING BETTER. SHE WENT TO 3 SETS WITH MATCH POINT IN THE TIE BREAKER. SO NOW THERE ISN'T ANY FOOTBALL AND TENNIS SUCKS WITHOUT SERENA AND VENUS. YA FEEL ME!!!!

GOTTA TELL YA, I WAS IN APOPKA WAITING FOR MY BUS FOR SCHOOL. I STOPPED OVER AT THE CHINESE SPOT ON MAIN STREET. THERE FOOD IS DOPE. BEST CHINESE FOOD IN TOWN. I CAN'T WAIT TO GET HOME TO TEAR IT UP. I ALMOST SWALLOWED MY TOOTH TRYING TO EAT ON THE BUS. ONE DAY SOON I WILL SWALLOW IT AND...YOU KNOW THE REST

I GOT THIS :)

SOCIAL ANXIETY

YA KNOW, I AM FEELING OUT OF SORTS.  I think my social anxiety has reached the internet. I am having a hard time connecting to folks. Well, since football is over and Serena isn't up till 2/12, I got time on my hands. Like I was saying to Rave, my female cat, we need to get more. She looked at me like I had lost my mind. Not only that, she walked away. I got the message. So, now I'm looking for Techno, my boy cat, he's a brown nose. He will sit and listen till I get tired of talking. That's it I just want them to listen. So sad...Well, it is not easy being a single parent to two cats with two different personalities. Anyway, just finished my test and I have admitted that I don't care to blog. I have to do it for my class and so I can't complain too much. Do you play Words with Friends?
I play and the words that these people put out there is wack. I have never seen so many letter Qs without letter U. I know they have an app that you can use. you put in the letters you have and it spits out all the possible words. SMH, I hold on to my integrity and not use that app. Guess what I'm doing this weekend...wheels up...

WITHDRAWALS

Ladies and gents, this is not a commercial. Sweats, shakes, unable to let remote down. Third go round with about 300 channels. THIS IS NOT A DRILL...only two more football games to go this season. I am ill just thinking about what's to come. It is too soon for me to indulge in basketball. that's not till March. Tennis has started, slow but good game. And yes I did set my alarm clock to 3am on both Saturday and Sunday to watch women's and men final from Melbourne. It was so why I love tennis. It is like a moving chess game. Serena and Aussie grand slam is no longer a match for her. She was hurt last year with Sloane beating her. This year again, hurt...with Ana Ivonivic. That would have been a tough but win-able match. Number 1 men and number 4 women's survived the carnage. Tennis is the best show in town. But...back to the fact that now I am overdosing on ID TV. SUV got a mini marathon going. not even a flutter of excitement there. Lifetime movies, too easy to get stuck on. Could watch Snapped, seeing women losing their minds, hmm...what the hell. Who doesn't like seeing stupidity at work. Juice, pizza roles, cats are sleep alrighty then... bring it....

REALLY:(

This is one day that needs to go into the books. I am thinking that IT will go away but IT is getting worse. I know your saying what the heck is IT. Well...you be the doctor. Ready, I am beginning to have episodes of loss of memory. I could be doing something and literally I will forget why I am doing something. My hands have episodes of tremors. My gait is getting worse I can't  I am leaning either sides of myself. At first I thought it was the heaviness of my backpack or not use to my weight. It is a little discouraging that by the time I raise my hand I have forgotten what we were talking about. I call it disconnecting. Just writing this I have disconnected 5x. My handwriting has changed. Spelling is a chore. I was thinking Parkinson's but onset is usually by manifesting at an earlier age. Brain tumors. Well, don't really want to go down that road. A bit frustrated but I am handling it. It is sad for me because my mind has always been my diamond in the rough. If there is evidence of something I rather know now than later. Well, its about that time. Wheels up in 30

OFF SEASON REBUILD WEEK 2

As a lifetime Oakland Raiders fan, this was suppose to be our break out season. Well it wasn't. As usual, the quarterback was the issue. Folks are so quick to suggest guys aren't NFL ready. First it was Tim Tebow and now Terrell Pryor. Oakland's has had quarterback problems for years. Pryor has been with us for 3 years. To not play him towards the end of the season was down right crap. They are not going to keep him for next season. At least how him off for trade purposes. He won games in spite of a lousy O-line to protect him. Now I know his ex-agent put the Raiders on blast with how they were not using him . It was crude and rude but it rang true. History has it that when we let a quarterback go some flourish on other teams. Now let's keep it real,  Raiders abuse their quarterbacks. I believe Rich Gannon was the last true quarterback. We have picked up QB every draft or free agency every year. When are we gonna get it right. We are taking hostages and then throw them under the bus. We are going to pick up another QB. Who do you think,  Manziel  or Bridgewater?

Raiders usually are the team that gives veteran footballers a second chance when Al Davis was alive.
There has been no shred of consistency for the last 10 years. Al always wanted to go with people that were  grateful and hungry to play. Pryor was the last of Davis era before he passed away. It is not the position but the management. This is the era of QBs needing to stand in the pocket or scramble. Pryor is a new age QB. There is Johnny Football, who is a one man show, will get swallowed up in the NFL. He is good but he won't be able to run around as he did in college. Bridgewater is just another Pryor. When are the fans gonna get a winning season? Is anybody listening? (ho-hum)

Thank GOD for the Winter Olympics and, yes, the BFF in my head, Serena Williams. This off season won't be all that bad. Good luck Oakland. Holla back at me in August. Aussie Open here I come. Working on another slam victory for Serena and Venus. Got to bounce... WHEELS UP IN 30..................................MOTZZZ

GRATITUDE

 IT'S AMAZING WHEN YOU FOLLOW GOD YOU GET THROUGH THINGS SMOOTHER. I AM GRATEFUL FOR THE OPPORTUNITY TO MASSAGE MY SOUL AND BECOME TEACHABLE. THIS IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO PRESS THROUGH FEAR, INSECURITIES AND CRITIZISM. GOD HAS ONCE AGAIN HAVE ME ON A PATH FOR HIS PURPOSE. I AM READY FOR A BREAK THROUGH. I CAN DO ALL THINGS THRU CHRIST WHO STRENGTHEN'S ME. THIS IS A NEW JOURNEY WITH OLD HOPES AND DREAMS. THE STRUGGLES HAVE BEEN THERE THE LAST 6 MONTHS. DIDN'T THINK I WAS GONNA MAKE IT. BUT AS JACOB WRESTLED AND HELD ONTO GOD SO TIGHT AND JACOB DIDN'T LET GO. GOD HAD TO CHANGE HIS NAME TO ISREAL. GRATEFULNESS. THE STRUGGLE IS PART OF THE TRAINING FOR GOD'S PURPOSE FOR US. WE TEACH AND REACH FOLKS THRU OUR TESTIMONIES. I GET THAT...FAITH... IF YOU ARE STRUGGLING IN YOUR LIFE YOU ARE PROBABLY NOT WHERE YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO BE. GOD DOESN'T TRY TO TRICK US. HE WILL GO WITH US TO THE VERY END WHEN WE ARE WALKING ON A ROAD NOT OK'D BY HIM. GRACE...DON'T DESERVE IT BUT ITS FREE. COMPLAINING OF IT..IT IS NEVER NOT THERE. MERCY...HE LOVES US TO WELLNESS...OK, TIRED NOW...AND IF NO ONE TOLD YOU THAT THEY LOVE YOU TODAY...YUP... GOD AND I LOVE YOU...